Honesty is not something you are born with, it is something that you grow into; being truthful determines where you go in life, the kind of people you attract, and ultimately in my personal opinion where you finish in life. The thing about integrity is most of the world lacks it, not only with others but with themselves because if you can’t be honest with yourself who can you be honest with? I got my heart shattered, not because of anything that happened during the relationship but because of the dishonesty/cowardness that happened in the aftermath.
I hope everyone out there knows that EVERYONE deserves the truth, no matter how it may sting or how it may affect another, honesty is always better than being lied to. If he had been honest from the start about what he wanted/ what he needed we could’ve been potentially really good friends, I would’ve forgiven a lot, I would’ve forgiven being emotional cheated on by being on a notorious hookup app while we were still together, I would’ve forgiven the sob story of how he felt his sickness prevented him from loving others (Pretty funny seeing as how he was talking to someone new two weeks later). I would’ve forgiven taking an expensive gift two weeks prior to dumping me then in return using the sob story mentioned previously knowing I wouldn’t take it back, then when I found out the truth and asked for it back was told “I don’t think I need to give it back, sorry.” I would’ve forgiven all of that and still would have given him my friendship had he been honest, but instead he chose the latter which was to lie and beat around the bush.
Speaking more about honesty let’s talk about a promise, a promise is something that should be considered sacred, therefore one should not make a promise they know they can’t keep/won’t keep; Being young isn’t an excuse to be a dick, I hope that most youth knows that, just because you are young that doesn’t give you any right to treat others like garbage, nothing bothered me more than how I was treated after the relationship ended, you say you love someone one day then the next pretend like they never existed, you potentially got someone else seriously ill and not even check up on them, no person in their right mind goes from being your best friend to some stranger on the street in less than 24 hours.
We could’ve been something great, whether it be uplifting each other in a relationship, or being there for each other as friends, he chose neither, he chose to lie and slither his way to the next victim. I hope everyone reading this knows their worth, I hope they know that even though it seems everyone out there is dishonest but, there are good people in the world you just have to go out and find them. I love/loved this man, and if he’s reading this I wish him nothing but the best and I hope he finds himself before he destroys himself, He’ll always have a place in my heart and there’s nothing I can do to change that, he was my person, but if he knew me now I’d be a stranger, that version of me died the second I realized those closest to you have the most potential to tear you down. I still have really hard days where I think about him, but I have to remind myself, I can do better I can find someone who is honest, caring, loving, I can find someone who envelopes my mind constantly, whom I smile for when I think about them, I’ll find that someday, I may not be ready now….but someday.